Prayers

I noticed something interesting on the Buzzfeed article that featured me last week. One of the comments said “I will be praying for the 13 people in this article.” or something to that effect.

Okay, I am a person of prayer. I will take all the prayers people want to throw at me.

But, don’t pray for me because I’m disabled.

I’m fine.

Pray for me because the world at large seems to think that accommodations means a special privilege or an advantage. I promise you that my disabled parking space is not because I deserve to be in the store faster than you.

Pray for me because there are things that are often hiding behind my “I’ve got this” attitude. Somedays, just like every other single human being, I’m not so sure I have ANY of it.

Don’t pray for the disabled simple because they are disabled. We are fine. We’d be more fine if people stopped putting their limitations on us. We’d be more fine if people would stop looking to us to inspire them. We’d be more fine if you saw us as complete and whole human beings.

 

Friendships of 2016

I want to close out the year writing about some of the things that have happened over the year. Not a full review or anything, just writing about the things that have influenced me. I noticed quickly as I was working on these posts that Friendship was a theme. Here’s the first in that series.

In March I went to the Aspiring Authors Madcap Retreat. It was amazing for a lot of reasons. But, the friendships I walked away with? Those are impossible to put into words.

I remember Emailing with Susanne and Meghan about getting a ride from the airport to the house where the retreat would be. I didn’t know them. I wasn’t sure what exactly would happen in Sister Mary Conseula (the vans name). I didn’t know that I would be riding with future amazing friends.

But, I remember trying to get myself to shut up. I talk a lot when I get anxious and I remember desperately trying to rein it in and I couldn’t. I didn’t want these new people to think I was conceited or an attention hog. It’s just the way my anxiety manifests. But, no one seemed to mind.

We got to the house. We were all standing around outside because we were early and they weren’t quite ready for us. It was a gorgeous day. And I was surrounded by other writers who were all just as apprehensive as I was. I think I was the only one who couldn’t get her act together to calm down. I remember talking to Tessa about how our wardrobes consisted of leggings and tunics.

Through the next five days I would meet the most amazing people. Tia and her endless piles of cokes and snacks. Heather who brought wine (thank God). More Meg(h)ans than I’d ever seen in one room. All of them lovely and beautiful. I can’t name them all because it would just be a list, but each of these people brought something special to that retreat. They made it okay for us to ask questions (or we’d just wait for Anna to do it, she had the best questions).

Our last night there we were all pretty exhausted. Mentally. Physically. It was a lot information to take in over the week. I’d laid down, earbuds in, covers over my face because the light was still on. I could hear Meghan asking where I was. My crutches were next to my bed, but I wasn’t there. She was afraid I was stuck somewhere. Now, she was also exhausted and hadn’t thought through all of it. It made me laugh. Occasionally that memory will still creep back into my head and make me smile.

It’s been almost a year since I found out I was going to get to go to this workshop. And in that year we’ve all suffered tremendous triumphs and sadness. We’ve celebrated and mourned together.

We built towers and burned boxes.

Things That Are Making Me Happy

I am frequent and loyal listener to the NPR Podcast Pop Culture Happy Hour. Each week they close out the show with what’s making them happy. I’m blatantly stealing this idea.

  1. The first one I got from Linda Holmes on PCHH. She mentioned the show Good Girls Revolt on Amazon Prime. It’s a fictionalized version of when the women at Newsweek sued the magazine so they could become reporters. It’s got a great story, great acting, fantastic costumes.
  2. I’ve been reading a lot lately. Let’s talk about Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo. It’s got a main character who is disabled. Know what the stories about? Not his disability. Go read it. It’s great.
  3. My new bullet journal. It’s more about list making for me. I love that. I ordered an Erin Condren journal to use. I love the idea of planners so much, they make me so happy, and after about month 2 I just lose all hope and put it in my phone. This way I can do both. I’ll report back in two months on how it’s going.
  4. I got a new hair cut today.
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Photo Credit: My Awesome Seven-Year-Old

5. ¬†About two weeks ago, maybe more, I saw a tweet that was a call for people with disabilities and our fears about the new administration. I responded. Here’s the finished project.¬†13 People With Disabilities Discuss Their Post-Election Concerns

So, this is what is making me happy this week. What’s making YOU happy?